I had a fascinating conversation with a client about weighing herself during which we came up with several reasons she and others do so. Fortunately, she’s interacting with her scale less and less and enjoying her disengagement more and more. Here are the reasons we think people weigh themselves, but there may be more.

Empowerment/control. My client talked about depending on the scale to help her feel in control of her life. Right now, her family and work life are feeling a bit tumultuous and shaky—in part because she’s becoming more mentally healthy and standing up for herself—and she feels uncertain about her future. So, she heads to the scale when she wants certainty. Because numbers are so neat, while our lives are often so messy, it’s easy to see how we’d be drawn to digits.

Progress/Reassurance. My client also recognized that she wants to know how she’s doing with food and views the scale as a way to assess success or failure. I also think people use weighing themselves to reassure themselves that they’re doing the “right” thing and are on the “right” track. Seeing a number that was less than yesterday’s is like getting a pat on the head that says, “good girl, good boy.”

Attention/Approval/Value. Another point that came up was that losing weight is tied to getting positive attention from others and societal approval, as well as feeling more valued. Seeing a drop in pounds brings us closer to that longed for moment when we’ll finally feel worth something (remember, in this culture less is more regarding weight) and we think people will treat us as we’ve always wanted to be treated: as lovable.

Clothes and Other Choices. For some folks, my client included, seeing a decreasing number on the scale means a widening of clothing options. For her it means wearing flashier outfits and finding clothes in her size. I think for others it also opens up other options, say for work, romance or travel. Maybe you can’t imagine yourself applying for a certain job as a higher weight person. Maybe you want to travel and are excited that you’ll finally fit easily into an airplane seat. Maybe you want to play the sports you did when you were younger, but don’t have the energy at your current size and weight loss would open a door to returning to them. Maybe you want to find a mate or lover.

Again, I don’t claim these are all the reasons people form a dependency on the scale and weighing themselves. Moreover, my client and I weren’t judging any of these possibilities, only staying curious about what drives behavior that is all too common and often addictive.

Best,

Karen