Karen's Blogs

Blogs are brief, to-the-point, conversational, and packed with information, strategies, and tips to turn troubled eaters into “normal” eaters and to help you enjoy a happier, healthier life. Sign up by clicking "Subscribe" below and they’ll arrive in your inbox. 

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Positive Possibilities

If you’re convinced you won’t amount to anything, will never finish what you start, and are doomed to have the same crummy struggles throughout your life, you may be programmed for failure. Believing you’ll never become a “normal” eater is a sure fire way not to. Whether you’re battling under- or overeating (or a yo-yo combo), you have to think you can succeed in order to beat your demons.

Stop and answer these questions: Do you whole-heartedly believe you can become a “normal” eater? Is your belief only half-hearted? Or are you certain you’ll never reach this goal? Belief doesn’t mean not having moments of frustration and doubt. It’s natural to wonder if major change is possible and occasionally to feel hopeless. The problem arises when you distrust yourself due the core belief that you’re basically a failure, will never accomplish much in life, and that there’s something defective or wrong with you that translates into preventing you from achieving success.

Maybe you’ve had a host of relationships that haven’t worked out, moved around a lot looking for just the “right” place to settle down, or switched jobs or careers and still feel dissatisfied. The problem may not be restlessness or even a desire for perfection. Instead, you may be convinced that you’re bound to fail because that’s what you learned in childhood. Many parents are unthinking, ignorant, or even cruel, and give children the message they’re failure bound as in, “You’ll never amount to anything.” Hear that often enough and it’s likely to sink in. You may not even realize you believe it. In other words, you may be operating on faulty assumptions you’re unaware of!

Successful people with realistic goals—at work, in relationships, with emotional and behavioral problems—believe they have the strength, commitment, motivation, resources, and ability to succeed. They know the only thing holding them back is themselves. They assume they’ll overcome and take it for granted. Recognizing that it won’t happen overnight and that they’ll have hurdles and setbacks, they nevertheless can’t imagine not reaching their goals. With this sense of positive possibility, we can all do anything within reason (and sometimes beyond what is imaginable).

Start cultivating an “I can” attitude. Stop and change your tune when you complain that becoming a “normal” eater is too hard and is taking too long. Simply cut off the thought and tell yourself that it’s nonsense. Remind yourself that a positive attitude is a pre-requisite for success. Tell yourself that you believe and sooner or later you will.

Eating Disorder Diagnoses
Choice or Disease

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This website is owned and operated by Karen R. Koenig, M.Ed., LCSW. It contains material intended for informational and educational purposes only, and reasonable effort is made to keep its contents updated. Any material contained herein is not to be construed as the practice of clinical social work or of psychotherapy, although adherence to applicable Florida States, Rules, and Code of Ethics is observed. Material on this website is not intended as a substitute for medical or psychological advice, diagnosis, or treatment for mental health issues or eating disorder problems, which should be done only through individualized therapeutic consultation. Karen R. Koenig, LCSW disclaims any and all liability arising directly or indirectly from the use of any information contained on this website. This website contains links to other sites. The inclusion of such links does not necessarily constitute endorsement by Karen R. Koenig, LCSW who disclaims any and all liability arising directly or indirectly from the use of any information contained in this website. Further, Karen R. Koenig, LCSW, does not and cannot guarantee the accuracy or current usefulness of the material contained in the linked sites. Users of any website must be aware of the limitation to confidentiality and privacy, and website usage does not carry any guarantee or privacy of any information contained therein.