Blogs are brief, to-the-point, conversational, and packed with information, strategies, and tips to turn troubled eaters into “normal” eaters and to help you enjoy a happier, healthier life. Sign up by clicking "Subscribe" below and they’ll arrive in your inbox.
[No unsolicited guest blogs accepted, thank you]
Here’s a newspaper headline that’s a prime example of why people have difficulty becoming “normal” eaters: “A party menu that won’t ruin your diet!” This makes it sound like a diet is something you’re on temporarily as if you might give up a diet someday, like an escalator on which you step on and off. Instead, lifestyle is a moving sidewalk you stay on to move forward and keep moving forward.
The idea is not to think of eating a particular way as temporary, but as permanent. Let’s just get rid of the word diet or dieting, period, and talk about what we’re really looking at: a lifestyle change, a new habit. It’s ongoing, not on and off. It’s forever, not for the moment. This is an example of how diet (versus) lifestyle thinking goes:
Say, your friends all order dessert after a restaurant dinner. Diet-think would go something like this: You consider whether you’re on or off your diet. If you’re off, you check out the dessert list and make a choice. If you’re on, you pass on dessert and feel virtuous and morally superior or you feel deprived, resentful and envious, watching everyone else eat theirs. Then you go home and polish off your sister’s stash of M&Ms.
Lifestyle-think would go like this: You assess your hunger, fullness and satisfaction level. You consider if any of the desserts appeal to you and why. You ponder (or ask) what ingredients are contained in whatever dessert you might choose and imagine how you’ll feel later or tomorrow if you eat it. You think about whether you already had a lot of sweets today or might have later and how you’ll feel today and tomorrow—proud or ashamed—about your choice after you’ve eaten or not eaten dessert.
Notice the difference in how you make the decision. One is for the long haul and one is for over in a heartbeat. One is based on what’s happening in your body with your appetite, while one is externally focused on what others are doing. One focuses on instant gratification and the other on happiness and well-being.
I’m not saying that eating dessert is wrong or bad for you. The point is that you want all your eating choices to be about self-care. Sometimes dessert is perfect and hits the spot. Sometimes it ruins how you feel the whole rest of the day—and part of tomorrow—because you feel ashamed and regretful and your body is bloated and fatigued.
Using the example above, think about how you often run with the pack when you wouldn’t dream of doing so with anything but food because you pride yourself in being an independent thinker. Remember, eyes on your own plate and it’s all about tomorrow.
This website is owned and operated by Karen R. Koenig, M.Ed., LCSW. It contains material intended for informational and educational purposes only, and reasonable effort is made to keep its contents updated. Any material contained herein is not to be construed as the practice of clinical social work or of psychotherapy, although adherence to applicable Florida States, Rules, and Code of Ethics is observed. Material on this website is not intended as a substitute for medical or psychological advice, diagnosis, or treatment for mental health issues or eating disorder problems, which should be done only through individualized therapeutic consultation. Karen R. Koenig, LCSW disclaims any and all liability arising directly or indirectly from the use of any information contained on this website. This website contains links to other sites. The inclusion of such links does not necessarily constitute endorsement by Karen R. Koenig, LCSW who disclaims any and all liability arising directly or indirectly from the use of any information contained in this website. Further, Karen R. Koenig, LCSW, does not and cannot guarantee the accuracy or current usefulness of the material contained in the linked sites. Users of any website must be aware of the limitation to confidentiality and privacy, and website usage does not carry any guarantee or privacy of any information contained therein.