Karen's Blogs

Blogs are brief, to-the-point, conversational, and packed with information, strategies, and tips to turn troubled eaters into “normal” eaters and to help you enjoy a happier, healthier life. Sign up by clicking "Subscribe" below and they’ll arrive in your inbox. 

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How to Not Recover from Your Eating Disorder

Many people don’t recover from dysregulated eating because they insist on doing things exactly as they always have done them and can’t seem to break out of that rut. My hope is that writing about what to do in order to stay stuck might actually help you get unstuck. Toward that goal, here are 10 ways to ensure that you will not recover.

1. Believe that it’s better to heal yourself than to garner support from others. Expect that you can make your eating disorder miraculously go away without telling anyone about it and not getting help.
2. Be very hard on yourself and beat yourself up for every eating “mistake” you make. Think that if you could only be harder on yourself, you’d get better quicker.
3. Believe that you’ll outgrow your eating disorder someday because it’s a phase you’re going through. This is similar to the belief that substance abusers have that they can stop any time they want and that they just haven’t wanted to stop badly enough yet.
4. Avoid reading or learning about how others have successfully gone from dysregulated eating to “normal” eating, believing you’ll find your own way.
5. Push away people who want to help you get better, convincing yourself that they’re being controlling or really don’t understand what you’re going through.
6. Pretend you don’t feel badly about having an eating problem or minimizing it.
7. Think that eating problems are all about food and weight and not about anything else your life.
8. Believe you’re the only one in the world with a problem that’s so challenging and that no one else could possibly understand what you’re going through.
9. Give up because you don’t think you’re worth putting effort into healing.
10. Think that just because you’ve tried and failed to recover that you never will. Be very impatient and fail to understand that recovery is a process, not an overnight event.

I hope that you understand that I’m blogging tongue in cheek here and have the utmost compassion for you as a dysregulated eater. I’ve been there in spades and counseled hundreds of people who have dysregulated eating. Most of them wanted desperately to be healthy and to never worry about their eating again. Some were ambivalent about giving up patterns that were hurtful but familiar. Many thought that other people could recover, but that it would never happen to them. Still others didn’t feel deserving of good health and emotional well-being. The key to success is self-honesty, self-disclosure, a willingness to seek and accept help, faith in the recovery process, feeling deserving of health and happiness, self-compassion, self-curiosity, learning new skills, resolving mixed feelings about recovery, persistence, patience, and never ever giving up.

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How to Think Like a “Normal” Eater

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This website is owned and operated by Karen R. Koenig, M.Ed., LCSW. It contains material intended for informational and educational purposes only, and reasonable effort is made to keep its contents updated. Any material contained herein is not to be construed as the practice of clinical social work or of psychotherapy, although adherence to applicable Florida States, Rules, and Code of Ethics is observed. Material on this website is not intended as a substitute for medical or psychological advice, diagnosis, or treatment for mental health issues or eating disorder problems, which should be done only through individualized therapeutic consultation. Karen R. Koenig, LCSW disclaims any and all liability arising directly or indirectly from the use of any information contained on this website. This website contains links to other sites. The inclusion of such links does not necessarily constitute endorsement by Karen R. Koenig, LCSW who disclaims any and all liability arising directly or indirectly from the use of any information contained in this website. Further, Karen R. Koenig, LCSW, does not and cannot guarantee the accuracy or current usefulness of the material contained in the linked sites. Users of any website must be aware of the limitation to confidentiality and privacy, and website usage does not carry any guarantee or privacy of any information contained therein.