French philosopher, historian, author and political activist Paul-Michel Foucault espoused an ethic of self-care based upon “his broader philosophical views on power, knowledge, and the self.” He saw ethics as an outcome of our outer world as much as our inner one and viewed it as key to conscious living and mental and physical health—a far cry from our current one-size-fits-all, often oppressive self-care ideas and ideals. 

Our ethics are the moral principles we (hopefully consciously) choose to guide our lives, the principles that make us do this and not that. Foucault argued that “modern societies have developed a form of power that operates through the regulation and normalization of individuals’ behaviours and identities. In this context, self-care becomes a crucial practice for individuals to resist and navigate these mechanisms of power.” 

These overt and covert societal or cultural expectations dictate how we should be and act. Never underestimate the hold they have on every aspect of our lives: work, family, appearance, religion, and how we’d best behave. These arbitrarily constructed “norms” exert power over us by telling us what’s appropriate and what isn’t, made worse by most people’s obliviousness that their ethics come not from reasoned thinking from within but have been mindlessly and blindly assimilated from external factors and forces. 

Foucault believed that “to follow an ethic of self-care requires ongoing critical reflection on how one is governed by external forces, including how they may be influenced by societal expectations and institutional norms. Engaging in this kind of cerebral exercise can be a way to cultivate a sense of autonomy and self-empowerment, as it allows individuals to develop their own ways of thinking and being in the world.” Note key words reflection, autonomy, self-empowerment, own ways, and expectations.

He wants us to question why we think what we think and do what we do and “challenge how history and ‘truth’ are constituted and presented to us” and he “insists on the ethical value of curiosity” which “marks a readiness to find what surrounds us strange and odd; a certain determination to throw off familiar ways of thought and to look at the same things in a different way.” I love and live by that concept of how we change.

Especially in this time of TikTok dispensed “self-care “advice, we must: stay curious about our needs and make decisions from them, not from what others do or tell us to do, identify our values and ethics and understand where they came from, follow facts, think critically, buck unproven trends and ideas, and know and do what’s best for us. 

Best,

Karen