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Karen's Blogs

Blogs are brief, to-the-point, conversational and packed with information, strategies, and tips to turn troubled eaters into “normal” eaters and to help you enjoy a happier, healthier life.Sign up by clicking "Subscribe" below and they’ll arrive in your inbox. 

[No unsolicited guest blogs accepted, thank you]

Buffet and Party Eating

At a party this summer, I ended up engaging in a hazard of my profession, watching people eat. There were a variety of celebrators at the party—mixed gender, from all classes and walks of life. An interesting crowd but, sadly, not a group of mindful eaters. First, I noticed the size of the portions taken from the buffet. Plates were medium-sized and most people heaped them so high and full that all I could see was food on them, no plate. I will say that there was plenty of variety on each plate, a bit of everything. Seated at large tables (mine happened to be right by the buffet), I was able to observe what my table members did and those going back and forth seeking more food. Almost to a person, every person at my table cleaned their plates, which surprised me. The food, truth be told, was okay but...
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Beliefs of Parents of Dysregulated Eaters

Most of us grow up believing what our parents believe, but we don’t think of these belief as belonging to our parents. We think they belong to us. In truth, they belonged to our parents and were passed down to us automatically. Many of these beliefs are healthy and rational, but an equal number may be detrimental to our health and mental health. Many dysregulated eaters have a set of beliefs which simply are not useful or beneficial in life, however they keep on believing them—and acting based upon them--as if they were truths. Sometimes these beliefs worked for your parents and sometimes they didn’t. You adopted them even though they were helpful and didn’t make you or your folks happy or successful. Here are some I’ve come across in my clinical travels. One is about productivity, that you must be busy and be doing something meaningful every minute of the...
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Satiation and Your Brain

There are times when I read new, scientific theories about the brain and food that I struggle about whether to blog about them or not. Quite frankly, more and more of the research these days indicates that eating and weight are biologically based. So, I think to myself, is it better to have the latest scientific observations even though they prove that our biology strongly underlies eating difficulties, or might it generate feelings of stuckness and hopelessness in readers. Fair warning, this is one of those blogs. According to an article in SCIENCE NEWS (10/22/11), Brain may subvert efforts to diet by Janet Raloff, “In obese people, even when the brain knows the body isn’t hungry, it responds to food as if it were. In normal-weight people, a neural reward system that reinforces positive feelings associated with food turns off when levels of the blood sugar glucose return to normal after...
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Slow Down Your Eating to Eat Less

One of the most effective changes you can make to stop overeating, is to s-l-o-w down. Compared to slow eaters, fast eaters recall less about what they’ve eaten, want to eat again sooner, and are more prone to weight gain. In fact, there’s evidence for a correlation between the pace at which we eat and the quantity of food eaten. Two University of Rhode Island studies prove this point. One compared eating rates and calories consumed for men and women. Rapid eaters ate “about 3.1 ounces of food per minute, versus 2.5 ounces per minute for medium-speed eaters and 2 ounces per minute for slow eaters.” Which category do you fall into? If you’re a fast eater, aim to become a medium-paced eater and if you’re already one, set your sights on becoming a slow eater. More news—it seems that, on the whole, men consume more calories at a sitting than...
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Ten Eating and Food Beliefs to Live By

If your beliefs about eating and food are unhealthy, your attitudes and behaviors will be too. That’s a fact. This means that if you want to be a “normal” eater, you have to think like one which involves sorting through your beliefs about food/eating/weight to make sure that they’re rational and healthy. Ten or so healthy core beliefs will do you just fine. To create a new belief system, read my book, THE RULES OF “NORMAL” EATING, which teaches you how to distinguish between rational and irrational beliefs and turn the former into the latter. Use the beliefs in the book to create your own set of 10 for eating. If you already know how to reframe beliefs, make a list of your own about eating/food/weight to form the operating system for your relationship with food and your body. Look for beliefs which underlie others, ones that program you to do...
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New Facebook App by Karen R. Koenig

One of my recurrent fantasies has been to have daily contact with my clients, book readers, message board members, and blog audience, and I’m excited to share with you that I’ve finally found a way to do it. I’ve created a confidential, free Facebook-only app called APPetite which will keep a virtual me near you every minute of every day. Well, perhaps that’s a bit of an exaggeration, but APPetite will place my ideas, suggestions and advice within easy reach whenever you want them. APPetite is the first Facebook application to help you create a positive relationship with food through a private Facebook journal and scheduled coaching prompts. There are three components to APPetite. First, in-the-moment advice is emailed to you daily via Facebook to keep you motivated and get you over the food bumps in your day. After completing a confidential profile about your eating habits, challenges and goals, you...
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Enjoying Food versus Eating

I love when I get ideas for blogs from clients. This one came from a remark a client made about finally enjoying food, rather than merely inhaling or consuming it. She was deriving pleasure—real pleasure— from the joys food has to offer rather than throwing herself into eating for all the wrong reasons. My client’s take is that she was so absorbed with the act of eating—of filling what she called her bottomless pit--that she never really focused enough on the actual food. Food was a means to an end, nothing more. Here are some of the ways the act of eating derails us. When eating is something to do when you have nothing to do or when you want to put off a task you perceive as unpleasant. When eating is a way of avoiding internal distress to make feelings seem less intense. In this day and age, eating has...
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The Obesity Gene

I wonder how many of you read the title of this blog and immediately groaned, “That’s probably me, alright.” Although it’s true that many overeaters carry a gene that makes them more inclined to obesity, your bummed-out response may not be as warranted as you think. Remember that weight is a bio-psycho-social issue. According to Beating the Obesity Gene (PARADE, 10/12/08), it’s true that genes can predispose you to overweight. The obesity gene, called FTO, “is found in more than half of some populations. And those with two copies of the gene are 70% more likely to be obese than noncarriers.” If your parents and grandparents are/were overweight, you’re a product of genes that have been passed down through generations. Remember, however, that a mere few hundred years ago you would have been happy about this inheritance because, during much of history, carrying extra pounds was a distinct health and longevity...
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Your Brain and Gratification

Over the years I’ve blogged on frustration tolerance and delaying gratification from the behavioral perspective. Now science tells us that specific parts of the brain influence our ability to defer pleasure (or not). In particular, research conclusions on spending versus saving tell us a lot about our eating patterns and their bio-psycho-social origins. Science tells us that there are measurable differences in the brain between folks who save or spend (NEWSWEEK, November 7/14, 2011), “…particularly in the areas of the brain that predict consequences, process the sense of reward, spur motivation, and control memory.” So maybe the fact that you struggle with delaying gratification and have difficulty saying no to food while others don’t is as biological as it is learned behavior. The prefrontal cortex of the brain, it seems, calms down messages that we receive from our midbrain which scream, “I want it and I want it now!” But “…the...
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Reconnecting to Your Eating Problem

While reading an article entitled Therapists and climate change by Garry Cooper (PSYCHOTHERAPY NETWORKER, 10-11/2011), I was amazed at the parallels that occur between repairing and protecting our natural world and attending to appetite. Turns out that both share similar psychological dynamics. A quote in the article on climate consciousness from The myth of apathy, an article by Renee Lertzman who teaches about psychology and sustainability, resonates with me: “…what appears to be apathy is really a ‘tangle’ of confusion, emotions and desires,” resulting in a gap between values and behaviors. Lertzman is saying that people have mixed feelings: On the one hand, they want to save the environment and, on the other, their every day behaviors contribute to destroying it. In psychology, this type of unconscious conflict involves denial, when fears and uncomfortable feelings and thoughts are pushed out of awareness. What looks like indifference or disinterest in change is...
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Scripting Difficult Eating Situations

One thing that leads us to eating in ways which are not in our best interest—and prevents us from stopping even when we’re aware we’re hurting ourselves—is the script that runs in our heads. It may come through loud and clear, be a barely audible whisper, or we may not even notice it because we’re on autopilot. Whichever, the way to create a different outcome in a situation is to create and practice a new script. Here’s the outline of a common script: Tired after a day of school/work/running around, on the way home you start thinking about eating to unwind. The voice in your head coaxes you toward places you can stop to buy your favorite treats. It insists that you deserve to relax after a hard day and that having a treat, just for now, won’t make a difference because you were “good” around food all day. You know...
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Snacking

What gives you the most trouble with eating—sit-down meals (in or out) or snacking? If the answer is snacking, it’s time to direct your energy and focus to changing your between-meal eating which, in turn, will improve your entire relationship with food. We used to have most, if not all, our food interactions sitting at a table with others. In fact, much of our eating was done at actual mealtimes. We used to eat a piece of fruit, crackers, or peanut butter to tide us over between lunch and dinner, lick an ice cream cone while out and about, munch popcorn at the movies, enjoy cotton candy at the circus or a red candy-apple after ice skating, and maybe snack on chips and dip before a late-night supper. Even these snacks, however, were generally eaten with our fannies planted firmly on some kind of seat—but rarely a car seat unless you...
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Societal Impact on Eating and Weight

If you’ve struggled to improve your eating and health to little avail, you may feel as if you’ve failed at the process. What you may not realize is that you’ve not been making this attempt in a vacuum. Yes, there may be internal factors that make it difficult for you to eat “normally,” but there are also external ones that may be undermining success. Health writer Jane Brody, describes these factors in Why, Oh Why, Are We So Fat? (Sarasota Herald-Tribune 9/20/11). Aside from wishing the article’s title said “Unhealthy” rather than “Fat,” I find Brody’s assessment of cultural changes affecting eating and activity level right on. It’s important to recognize how society has shaped us—as well as to understand how we’ve shaped ourselves—because there are substantial overt and covert external factors impacting our attitudes about and behavior around food. Brody asserts that Americans began to gain weight steadily in the...
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Habituating to Challenging Foods

Here’s an interesting headline—“Food habituation may help weight loss”—from a nutrition newsletter summarizing results of a study published in the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition (8/11). The results support what intuitive eating professionals have been advising for decades: habituating to a food can help you avoid overeating it. The summary in Environmental Nutrition (10/11) says: “The effects of food habituation—a form of learning in which repeated exposure leads to decreased response—was investigated in a study of 16 obese and 16 non-obese women, who were randomly assigned to receive a macaroni and cheese meal five times, either daily for one week or once a week for five weeks. In both obese and non-obese women, daily presentation of the food resulted in faster habituation and less calorie intake than did once-weekly presentation of the food. This study supports the theory that the habitual presentation of a small variety—compared with a wide variety—of calorie-dense...
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The Day After

The day following a holiday feast or any major food event deserves a blog promoting reflection. Print this one out and save it to read after every occasion when you’re eating outside your routine. It will help you reflect on your progress with “normal” eating skills. Better yet, it will remind you of the nonjudgmental mindset needed to continue recovery. First, identify the part of you that is interested in your behavior but has no intention of judging it. That might take a minute or two, but keep at it until you’re there. If that mindset seems elusive, relax your body, take a few deep breaths, and return to seeking that calm, compassionate place in you that is curious about your eating and wants the best for you, but is without criticism. When you’ve found that sweet spot, stop and smile. Be happy that there’s a part of yourself that is...
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Halloween Eating Doesn’t Need to Be Scary

I remember when I used to fear Halloween—not because of spooky ghosts and goblins, but because of what I thought of as the terrifying temptation of candy. This fear began in adolescence and continued until I was well into my journey to “normal” eating. Here are some new findings on eating candy, which may help you be less afraid this Halloween. A PSYCHOLOGY TODAY article entitled, The science of willpower: secrets for self-control without suffering, by Kelly McGonigal has some interesting thoughts on eating sweets although I don’t subscribe to the concept of willpower. “People who regularly eat candy live longer than those who don't. A multi-decade study from the Harvard School of Public Health showed that modest candy consumption is associated with the greatest benefit, but even those with a daily habit lived longer than those who never indulged. This benefit could not be explained by other factors such as...
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Planning Ahead with Food

Here’s a lament I hear repeatedly from clients: I was out and got really hungry and since I didn’t have any food with me, I ended up eating food I really didn’t want and now I feel crummy and mad at myself. Sound familiar? If so, why not start planning ahead? When they’re going out with children, parents (and other adults) know the kids will get hungry and, therefore, plan ahead. In fact, who’d ever think of taking out the brood without packing a snack? Knowing they’ll need nourishment, this task becomes part of the going-out routine. The question is why more adults don’t think ahead this same way knowing that they’ll get hungry if they don’t eat for several hours. Why indeed? In part, this omission is about poor self-care. Planning for nutrient needs is part of doing what’s healthy and self-valuing, a way of saying, “Nourishing myself is vitally...
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Eating and Neural Pathways

I’m fascinated by brain chemistry and behavioral change, especially knowing that we can learn to think/act/feel in new ways. In fact, more and more scientific evidence points to the brain’s amazing neuro-plasticity. That means that it’s time to stop saying you think/feel/behave a certain way regarding food or weight and, therefore, must continue—and start thinking and talking about doing things differently. You’ve probably heard that “neurons that fire together wire together,” meaning that paired activities, or activities and thoughts or feelings, bond on a biochemical level the more they occur at the same time. Such as habituating to snacking as soon as you walk in the door after work, mindlessly having a dish of ice cream every night while watching the news, or thinking about being fat as shameful and disgusting. Repeated pairing of these activities reinforces neural pathways that will stay paired. Whether or not you’re aware of this cause...
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Eyes on Your Own Plate

Remember how teachers cautioned you to keep your eyes on your own paper during a test? They did so because they wanted you to develop skills and knowledge on your own. If you don’t do so already, it’s time to apply the same approach to eating. Everybody seems to have an opinion these days on what you should or shouldn’t eat—your neighbor, doctor, mother, father, brother, friend, cousin, the supermarket check-out clerk, your third-grader, and everyone you have more than a five-minute chat with. Some days you may feel so bombarded with advice that you want to lock yourself inside the refrigerator just to have a quiet moment to think. Forget such drastic measures. All you need to do is develop a “my own plate” mentality and resist peeking at what others are eating. Instead, ask yourself what you feel like having. How much food is enough for you? How does...
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Glycemic Index Findings

It seems as if every few years or so a new approach to losing weight pops up and markets its way into mainstream culture. The glycemic index (GI), focusing on blood sugar levels and carbohydrates, has been in vogue for some time. Now, however, studies tell us that using the GI is not a one-size-fits-all tool for eating, working for some people but not others. An article in the June 2011 TUFTS UNIVERSITY & NUTRITION HEALTH LETTER, Findings cast doubt on glycemic-index appetite effects, explains how the glycemic index may not impact appetite as its promoters would have us think. A Netherlands’ Unilever Research and Development study led by Harry Peters, PhD, “tested the theory that low-glycemic index (GI) carbohydrates that digest more slowly and have more gradual effects on insulin and glucose levels might combat hunger better than high-GI foods.” Peters team found previous studies of GI and appetite inconclusive....
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This website is owned and operated by Karen R. Koenig, M.Ed., LCSW. It contains material intended for informational and educational purposes only, and reasonable effort is made to keep its contents updated. Any material contained herein is not to be construed as the practice of clinical social work or of psychotherapy, although adherence to applicable Florida States, Rules, and Code of Ethics is observed. Material on this website is not intended as a substitute for medical or psychological advice, diagnosis, or treatment for mental health issues or eating disorder problems, which should be done only through individualized therapeutic consultation. Karen R. Koenig, LCSW disclaims any and all liability arising directly or indirectly from the use of any information contained on this website. This website contains links to other sites. The inclusion of such links does not necessarily constitute endorsement by Karen R. Koenig, LCSW who disclaims any and all liability arising directly or indirectly from the use of any information contained in this website. Further, Karen R. Koenig, LCSW, does not and cannot guarantee the accuracy or current usefulness of the material contained in the linked sites. Users of any website must be aware of the limitation to confidentiality and privacy, and website usage does not carry any guarantee or privacy of any information contained therein.  Privacy Policy